What is co-parenting?
Co-parenting is when you share the tasks and responsibility for raising a child when you are divorced or separated from the other parent. When a relationship breaks down, you might start living separately. Lots of decisions will need to be made about your child, including:
- Living arrangements
- Decisions about the child's health and education
- How you will contact and communicate with the other parent
- How to manage special occasions
Tips for co-parenting
Try to put your child first, even if you feel very emotional. Co-parenting works better for kids if you:
- Can communicate calmly with your ex-partner
- Listen to and acknowledge your child's feelings
- Live near to the other parent
- Are consistent about rules and rewards
- Plan for activities, holidays, and special events, such as birthdays
- Encourage your child to have a relationship with the other parent
What does the law say about co-parenting?
Australia's Family Law Act says both parents are responsible for the care and welfare of their children. The law presumes it's best for most children if both parents:
- Allow the other parent to maintain a relationship with your child
- Support and care for your child
- Co-operate with each other to make plans that are best for your child
- Explain their co-parenting arrangement to your child
If there is a dispute about children, the Family Court can make parenting orders. These orders can state:
- Who your child should live with and spend time with
- Who should make decisions
- Where your child should go to school
- Whether your child should have a medical procedure
Parenting plans and consent orders
Parenting plan
For co-parenting to work, it's best to have a parenting plan. This is an agreement between you and your former partner. It doesn't involve going to court. A parenting plan can detail:
- How you will share parenting responsibilities
- Who the kids will live with
- The amount of time to be spent with each parent
- What you will do around holidays and special events
- Your child's education
- Your child's health care
- Financial care
A parenting plan is not legally enforceable.
Parenting consent orders
If you want a legally binding document, you and your former partner can prepare a written consent order. This is like a parenting plan, and it covers parenting and financial arrangements for your kids. Parenting orders are enforceable by the courts. A consent order needs to be approved by the court, but neither parent needs to attend court.
Resolving disputes when co-parenting
Family relationship centres
If you can't agree on a parenting plan, you can get help from:
- A family relationship centre
- A relationship or family counsellor
- A dispute resolution service
These options are cheaper, easier, and less stressful than going to court. You can call the Family Relationship Advice Line on 1800 050 321 for information.
Family Court
The next step is to seek legal advice and get a 'court parenting order' or a 'financial order'. This is a plan made for you by the courts. Before applying for a parenting order, you should attend family dispute resolution.
You can go straight to the Family Court for a parenting order (without trying dispute resolution) if:
- Your child might be at risk of abuse or domestic violence by your former partner
- You or your former partner can't co-parent due to physical or mental illness
- You or your former partner can't participate in co-parenting due to location
- The matter is very urgent
Child support payments
A binding child support agreement is a signed agreement between both parents about child support payments. It can be made through Services Australia for any amount that you both agree on. It can include cash payments as well as non-cash payments such as school fees. Each parent should get legal advice before entering into the agreement.
You can also apply for a child support assessment. This tells you how much child support you should pay or receive. It's based on both of your incomes and family circumstances.
Resources and support
You don't have to deal with everything on your own. Get help if you need it. You can ask your doctor for a referral to a psychologist. Or you can:
- Contact Relationships Australia on 1300 364 277 or read one of their information booklets
- Call the Family Relationships Advice Line on 1800 050 321
- Visit The Family Court of Australia website
- Call Kids Helpline on 1800 55 1800
Expert Family Lawyers Across Australia
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